


Return

by Kass



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Collection: Purimgifts Day 3, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-16 01:08:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29567991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kass/pseuds/Kass
Summary: Our train was approaching the city walls when Suyin broke the silence.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 3
Collections: Purimgifts 2021





	Return

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ambyr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ambyr/gifts).



Our train was approaching the city walls when Suyin broke the silence. "You can have your choice of quarters.""

I was startled. "Isn't there someplace you were planning to put me?" Even the poorest people in Zaofu lived in quarters less meager than the ones I'd been confined to in jail. I had assumed Suyin had some small cell in mind. I'd been fine with that. But this kindness was startling, and that threatened to undo me.

"You can't have your most recent quarters, of course," she said, inclining her head graciously, "but otherwise it's up to you, as long as you're within the limits."

The limits of the Beifong family compound, she meant. Those were the conditions of my house arrest.

This still didn't feel real.

My most recent quarters: she meant my old room from when I was Captain of the Zaofu Guard. Captain's quarters are surrounded by concentric rings of soldiers' quarters. No one would have allowed me back there. And it wouldn't have felt right, anyway. Those quarters belong to Zaofu's most loyal protector. That certainly wasn't me.

But I didn't want my childhood bedroom, either.

Suyin had left it unchanged once I moved into the barracks. She used to joke that I ought to be able to come home to my old bedroom just like other soldiers did when they visited their families, but I'd never wanted to return to that room. It reminded me too much of what it had felt like to be a child there: unwanted and alone.

I bowed my head -- a gesture of submission, a correct gesture. "Thank you for your kindness."

"You're still part of our family."

That was when my composure broke. "I was never part of your family!" My voice shook slightly with anger. "I know exactly what your children think of me." My one ally had been Bataar, and I'd lost him.

"I'm not sure you do."

I looked out the window because I didn't want her to see my face. We were speeding past the inner ring of fields; we'd be in the city in minutes. "Why did you agree to this?"

"Because I could have been a better mother to you. And because I think you can change, and our family will be more whole with you than without you."

"I don't know why you think that," I muttered.

"Maybe someday if you become a mother, you'll understand."

The horn sounded, the train glided to a halt, and the doors whooshed open. 

"Welcome back," Suyin said, and rose, extending a hand to gesture that I should exit first. I was strangely grateful that she hadn't said welcome home. This wasn't home anymore. Or maybe it wasn't home yet. 

But maybe she was right that it could be -- that I could start over.

I took a deep breath and stepped out of the train.


End file.
